I have written about this before but it is coming up a lot lately with lots of friends and relatives pregnant and having babies and I got a call Sunday that my best friend is pregnant again:) I am SOOOOOOOOOO excited for her and I get to be there again when the baby is born. I loved getting to see her first little girl enter this world. I wish we lived closer so I could be there more. I miss that little girl and I miss my best friend like crazy!!! So this again brought up my baby questions.
I wouldn't worry so I guess, but it is not like I am getting any younger:) I know people have babies older but it is nice to be younger and have some energy when they are teenagers:) I go back and forth with it. I know that Eric wants kids terribly but he never pushes it on me and never pressures me. I just worry about being able to take care of them, provide things they need and some of the things they want:), I worry I will regret it, I worry what this world will even have to offer them the way things are going. I guess another big reason is that we are so secluded from all our friends and family. I don't want my kids to grow up alone. I want to be responsible and be financially stable and all that, but realistically that will NOT be any time in the near future. I wish it was but it isn't. Then everyone always says if you wait till you can afford them you will never have them. That is true I guess.
I just really don't know what to do and I feel a lot of pressure lately to make a decision. I am definitely excited to get the insurance in a few months and get some stuff figured out with my health and then talk with the doctor about even the possibilities. I guess the biggest thing is I am a BIG FAT CHICKEN!!!!!
Have a baby. They are a blessing from the Lord. LAdies have babies everyday and you will never feel ready until you do it and then the Lord makes you ready. It isn't as expensive as you would think either. We had our first on a 700 dollar a month salary with a house. It was tight but there are all kinds of government helps for kids. Anyway that is my two cents worth.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the advice TJ and Mark, I always love hearing from you!!!:)
ReplyDeleteI struggled with this same thing last year. I went back and forth and back and forth. Finally when I was told that if I have a baby, the Lord will provide. He wants us to have children and if anything, just love them unconditionally. When we finally decided to start trying I found out that I will have a harder time then most at getting pregnant. It's been months and still no luck. I wish we would have decided to try long ago when we were debating whether to or not. Just pray about it, you'll know when you are supposed to try :)
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