I'm Still Alive

Wow has it been a crazy begging to this year.  I have picked up more hours at work so I keep extra busy.  Yes I said work.  I have been working part time for a while at an Arabian farm.  I worked there years ago for 4 years as barn manager.  With my arms sooooo messed up I can't work in the barn now, but I am the office manager and then help when needed with the horses and such.  Hoping maybe things will get better with my arms with time and allow me to work more directly with the horses.  It has been 2 1/2 years though so I have to look at the possibility the issues in my arms will be permanent.  I don't want to accept that and I work to try and make things better but I also can't fool myself with hardly any strength and horrible pain.  Even working 3 days a week has been a HUGE challenge with pain and problems:(  But I do enjoy being around the horses and feeling useful.
   Eric is finally back home all the time now.  We had made the decision to move north for his job but then his boss pulled some really crappy stuff and didn't pay him what he was told he would be paid so we decided to just stick around here for now.  So it has been stressful and crazy.  We are praying for guidance in where the LORD wants us next.  We both feel like Oregon and busy places are not for us.  Everywhere has its thing right, but I don't care for the hustle and bustle so much.  There is a lot to that feeling but some of it I honestly just don't want to get into now:)
  I guess I just want to feel like I belong and feel like I am home.  As a christian I realize this is not "our home" and really we never "belong"  but I do believe we are given peace and joy here to.  I just feel as though I have not found that place yet.  I think the closest for sure and where I am pulled to is South Dakota.  We LOVED LOVED LOVED it there and if we could have found work there when things went south on the ranch we would have never left.  I loved the pace, loved the weather, loved the people, it was just a great place and we have great friends( more like family) we left behind there.  I don't regret any of the places we have been for sure.  I wish things had gone differently sometimes but in the big picture we have seen and lived in some AMAZING places and for that I would not trade it.  But it would be nice to have a place of our own.  A place to not only call home but feel at home.  A place I can paint and decorate and make my own:)  I REALLY hope GOD has that in our future for us:)  I don't know what the next year will bring but looking back on my life, I can say it always is full of surprises.
   I need to get back into blogging and keep updating things but it has been crazy.  I will try harder:)   Hope everyone's 2014 has started out well.  May it be a year of much growth and many blessings!

HAPPY NEW YEAR

It has been a rough week so I did not get any posts done to review 2013 I may still do that in 2014.  May everyone have a VERY blessed New Year!!!

Christmas week already!!

I can't believe it is almost here already.  I don't know about anyone else but this Christmas season just hasn't seemed like Christmas.  No one really seems in the spirit this year:(  I drive around and not many decorations, not very many people wishing holiday greetings and saying Merry Christmas.  It just seems kind of sad this year.  I try and remember the real reason for the season and that his spirit is what should show especially this time of year.  So I have tried to keep my spirit and enjoy the Christmas season:)
   It does make you miss those you love that can't be with you for all reasons.  So I try and reflect a lot this time of year on what I have learned and what I want to change and work on in the next year.  May everyone have a VERY VERY blessed Christmas full of love, laughter and many memories.  May we all remember the true reason for the season!!! Christ our LORD!

Its that season of hustle and bustle and gleaming lights:)   I love the Christmas season and I love to show my Christmas spirit. So this is what we got done on the house this year:)  Our house is actually really fun for decorating but it does lack enough outdoor plug ins:)  But here are a few pics of the decorations this year.

Yes rudolph is taller than the house roof.  He is 12' tall:)

And Santas stable is 18' long:)  Love it!!! This one is new this year.

This is in remembrance of my old Dog Kohanna that went to heaven little over a year ago.  

December Already!!!

Can't believe it is December again already.  Another year has gone by sooooo crazy fast!!!  It has been another crazy year full of growth and learning.  It has been a rough one but I think I learned a lot and enjoyed all the good in between. We are trying to set some goals and figure out where we want this crazy life of ours to go.  We have done so much and been so many places:)  We shall see where next:)
   We both agree we are wanting to be done with the moving for the most part and we want to have a place of our own.  We also both agree we are not thinking Oregon will be that place.  I love my friends and family and it is hard being away from them but I think it is better to come and visit.  Even though our weather has been prity awesome lately I am not a big fan of all the rain, miss my cold and snow like crazy, and I just really miss a slower paced life.  Oregon is go, go, go. Hurry, hurry, hurry.  Everything is rushed and anxiety ridden.  I don't think I realized that when I grew up here but returning I just see so much impatience and rushing and such.  We both REALLY miss South Dakota and we both wish we had never left.  At the time if we could have come up with another work option and such we would have chose to stay in a heart beat.  We loved the sturgis/deadwood area and it felt like home.  Even the last time we went up to visit friends and move some stuff it just felt like home. Like where we belonged.  We just both like the simpler.
   I find here I feel so much more anxiety, I feel so much pressure, I have to soft a heart so I get hurt VERY easily by things and people.  I know I would miss some people sooooo very much but I think I would be a better person and friend if I just visit.
   So we are praying and seeing where the LORD will lead us and what doors shall open.  We will see what the rest of 2013 shall bring:)

Everyone needs one

http://www.crystalpeaksyouthranch.org/ranch-life/2014-cpyr-calendar-order-form/

I do this every year!!! They are free but with a recommended donation of at least $7.00.  I do at least $20.00 just to donate to an amazing place!!! If you have never heard of or visited Crystal Peaks youth ranch you need to check out their website.  They do amazing work with kids and rescue horses.  They are a christian based ranch that came from nothing with the help of the LORD to affect millions.  Kim has written 4 books about the ranch and those that come there.  It really is an amazing ministry.  So I encourage everyone to order a calendar and donate to help this ministry help lots of kids, people and horses.  Great time of the year to give!

Motivational Monday

This is definitely motivation.  I am not condemning those who divorce.  I have been married before and divorced.  I tried with all my might to fix my marriage but it takes two and you should never put up with abuse.  And from a christian stand point never marry without GODs blessing as I did in that instance.  I just think in this society this is such a huge thing that runs rampened and not only in marriage but all relationships.  We just throw it away if it doesn't work for us.  I know sometimes there are circumstances where you have to let a relationship go but in general if we would just treat each other better, have more understanding, showed loyalty, and stood up for what was right and wrong we would be so much better off in personal relationships, buisness, etc.  We have just become such a me, me, me society.  So I think it would be great if we could follow this.  If something is broken at least try to fix it.