A Life on Dreams and Prayers

The Vow

2012-02-11T23:54:00.003-07:00

The Vow is an awesome movie. It is one of those movies that makes you think and makes you appreciate what you have for sure. I am sooooooooooooooooo VERY lucky to love my husband the way I do. It is a love that is indescribable and that is unlike any I have ever felt or seen really. My husband loves me NO MATTER what!!! He has been through so much with me in these past 5 years and he loves me fiercely still!!! I can't imagine life without him. He is my everything!! He is truly my best friend and my love!!! I don't want to ruin the movie for those who haven't seen it but I can't possibly imagine that situation. I am blessed to have the love of my life and to know that THE VOW we made is the most important thing we have ever done in both our lives and we meant every word of the in sickness and health, for richer for poor, until death do us part!!! Just a good movie to remind you of how life can change in the blink of an eye and that love is enough!!!

Get to know me a little better

2012-02-11T19:39:00.004-07:00

I got to thinking today..... I know dangerous huh:) Well I know my life hasn't been very exciting lately and that has really been getting to me. I have always been a go getter. Never liked sitting down and was never afraid to try a lot of new things but the last few years have really knocked me down and kicked me over and over while I was down. But hey that happens sometimes right. Well I got to thinking maybe I would share some of my past. I actually have had quite an interesting life in the past. I just need to figure out how to get some of the pictures on disk or something so I can make my posts more exciting:) So hopefully soon I will have some fun pics to show y'all about my crazy life:) A few pics of things I will post about....be lots of different things:)

working on different ranches

about a very special girl I had that I miss so dearly

the elk ranch I lived on...amazing:)

showing

Nothing exciting

2012-02-11T16:47:00.002-07:00

Haven't been up to much. Just sitting around the house recovering. Hopefully this arm will heal better than the last. I am just hoping by summer to be healed enough to start riding, and doing more stuff. I can't wait to have both arms to use again. It has been 7 months of only one arm injured that works so to say it has been trying is an understatement:) So hopefully in next couple months it will heal well and I can put it all behind me:)

I need to get caught up on all my blog reading. I have had a lot of nausea with all this so haven't gotten much read. Hopefully this next week. I can get caught up.

I took Kohanna to vet today and they did another heart worm test and the dot barely showed up so they gave me the go ahead to start him slowly into some exercise and then in may we will test him again and it should all be gone. Just so glad he did so well with his treatments and thankful to still have my baby here with me:)

Missing riding

2012-02-07T09:58:00.002-07:00

I know a lot of my frustration has come from not riding. Horses and riding have always been my therapy. My injuries have really stopped a lot. So hopefully by summer I will be back to riding! I miss it so much!!!!

trying to stay positive!

2012-02-06T09:35:00.002-07:00

I have really been trying to stay positive and keep my posts positive, but with how things have been going I would never be able to write! I am still trying to stay positive. Trying to Trust GOD and let Go and let GOD!!! But it is just one thing after another!!! I was really looking forward to 2012 but it has been one bad thing after another!!! So just trying to do the best I can and keep thinking positive but it is hard with it all the time and feeling like crap everyday. When it rains it pours is so true!!!

Eric had is his surgery the 28th of December and he was suppose to be off for 2 weeks and then light duty. well after the two weeks his boss said he won't let him come back till he full duty well who can afford to live with 6-8 weeks with no pay:( We were upset as we would have just waited for his surgery had we known. I mean he needed it but we can't go that long without an income. My workers comp doesn't come close to paying half of everything. But anyways GOD is good trusting him to help. Then he filled his aflac to help and called couple days ago and they didn't even receive it from our rep:( He has been not a help at all. Then the truck went to heck and is in a million pieces waiting for a paycheck to replace the head gasket, etc. Good thing Eric is a mechanic and can do it all to save us a lot of $ there, and then the brake in the car went to crud and stuck on, fixed that and now it has some pulley or something bad:( I could go on and on about every little thing that has gone wrong from the animals, to cars, etc. But I won't I just wanted to vent it and let it go. To try and keep my chin up and think more positive!!

I still hope 2012 brings some good changes and that things can look up. I know this life ain't easy and I am grateful for the good things I do have!!!! That is what I am trying to keep my eyes on:)

had my surgery monday

2012-02-01T10:32:00.002-07:00

Had my right arm bicep tendon repaired on Monday. I am glad they got it fixed finally. Now it will be lots of physical therapy and hope it gets more motion back then the left. so doing everything with my left is going to be a challenge for a while:) So for now I am only up a little since I still get naucious. I can't wait to catch up on everyone's blogs:)

Being Part of a Miracle!!!

2012-01-28T09:26:00.002-07:00

I have so much that has been going on in the past weeks but I will have to catch up on that after my surgery on Monday:)

But yesterday was an amazing day. Yesterday I got to go with my best friend for her to be induced and to be there for her through the whole thing and see her deliver he precious baby boy!!! It was sooooooooooooooooo amazing. To see a miracle from GOD enter this world is such and awesome experience and it reminds you of how big he really is:)

She was induced at 7am and then the labor began and she did well till about 2 and then the big contractions started and then when she needed the epidural another patient had and emergency and was rushed to the OR so they did not have anyone that could do her epidural so for the next hour and half she had to just work through the pain which she did like a champ:) Then they got her her epidural and things started to be better for her but then two hours later her eye was bothering her and then her arm went numb. I guess this is very rare but they had to shut off her epidural because if it continued it could have caused her to not be able to breath. So as it started to wear off again she had to do it all natural. She did amazing!!!!! Then when it was time to push I got to hold her right leg while her husband held her left leg and she pushed like crazy!!! They did not know the sex of the baby so when dad got to announce it was a BOY!! Lots of tears were shed around the room and the bonding began for mom and the baby:) Baby Boy was

9lbs 13 1/2 OZ 20 1/2" long and a 15" head. We all got a chance to hold him and say our hellos. Then at 11pm-16 hours after arrival I headed back. I will see them one more time before I have to leave back to Colorado. I will miss them VERY MUCH!!!

Just so thankful that all turned out well and that baby is happy and healthy:) And even more grateful my best friend of 21 years is happy and healthy!!!

so much been happening

2012-01-21T21:16:00.001-07:00

A lot has been happening but I haven't been able to get online. So I will have to get back to catching my blog up after my surgery on the 30th. I will be having my right arm repaired this time so it may take a while to be able to type. But I will get back to it then. Hope all is well with everyone, I need to get caught up!!!

Hanging on by a thread!1

2012-01-10T13:43:00.002-07:00

that is what the doctor said about my bicep tendon. I will have surgery on the 30th to repair that one now. Today Kohanna is in getting his first treatment for his heartworm so praying all goes well. Not much else for news right now. Thanks for all the thoughts and prayers!!!

News On Kohanna-Not the best:( But hopeful!

2012-01-07T18:54:00.001-07:00

So Kohanna hasn't been quite himself lately and has been having some breathing issues so after rescheduling him a couple times this week for emergency doc visits and MRI we got him into the vet yesterday. They did blood work and x-rays. We looked at x-rays yesterday and they looked really good, actually better than she thought for an old dog like him. Then today she called with the results of blood and it is heartworm:( that is NOT good. But she said it is probably early in the stages so she thinks we can do the treatment and he will be ok. So next week he will go in for his treatments. Two days in a row. He will get an injection deep in his back muscle so he will be on pain meds and then they will monitor him all day. Then we pray he is able to shed the dying worms without any issues and then no activity for the next month, not even walks. For Kohanna that won't be an issue:) lazy boy!!! She said other than this his bloodwork is awesome so he should have an even longer life:)

Now to get our other boys tested soon and make sure they get on prevention. Didn't know it was around here but I guess Grand Junction has quite a bit of it. So praying theirs comes out negative and we can get Kohanna better!

This just made me laugh:)

2012-01-07T12:57:00.002-07:00

This was a big window down town that had gotten broken:( But what someone wrote on the boards. Funny:)

MRI today

2012-01-05T09:14:00.002-07:00

So on Wed at my physical therapy appt my physical therapist was working on my right arm, which is my good-bad arm. The one we haven't done surgery on. She was just trying to slowly straighten it and all the sudden I felt a bad pull-tear feeling and then severe, severe pain. It didn't go away with ice and heat or time so I made an appt to see my orthopedist yesterday and he thinks the bicep tendon tore more and will need surgery but they need an MRI to know for sure. So I go up to aspen today for the MRI and get the results Tues. Praying everything works out for the best!!

Hope 2012 goes better than it has started

2012-01-02T19:42:00.002-07:00

Well I really hope 2012 goes better than it has started. Yesterday Eric's groin area and leg started having really sharp pains, and then at 2:30am this morning he woke me up in excruciating pain, this man hates hospitals and such and he was saying he needed to go so I knew it was bad pain. So we loaded him up and took him in and Dr says he thinks it may be a nerve sewn up in the mesh or something. Gave him a shot of pain meds and upped some meds and sent us on our way. It is off and on now so hopefully no more BAD pain. Then as we pulled into the driveway this horrible rubber smell came through the vents. Checked it today and the line for the oil pressure to the turbo broke:( We did finally after most of the day get the parts to fix it. Then get home and my old dog Kohanna isn't feeling well. Got a fever and the chills and just not himself:( I am going to watch him for a little while and see if he will be ok through the night and into the dr tomorrow:( Just hoping it gets better from here.

Hope everyone has had a better start to their new year!!!

2011 another crazy year!!

2011-12-31T07:30:00.002-07:00

Well where to start with 2011??? It has been a crazy year with some big changes. And lots to think about for the future! I know no matter what I am truly blessed to have an amazing husband, and an awesome GOD that gives me hope and a future!!! It has been a year of trials but also of growth. Especially for me in trying to not stress so much and for turning it over to the LORD! We got out of ranching in January:( We both miss it sooooooooooooooooo very much, we realize you don't get rich doing it and it is the life style we like more than anything, but we weren't able to do it with all the medical bills and no health insurance. We still pray that we can find a ranch that either pays well enough to purchase health insurance or carries it so that we can get back to what we love. Money is needed and great for things but it isn't everything either so we just want to get things going in the right direction and hopefully get back to what we love...RANCHING:) But who knows you never know where GOD may put you next:) We have been loving Colorado for all it has to offer in views, hiking, and such. But is has been a trying year with me tearing the bicep tendons in both my arms in July, surgery on one and probably still yet on the other, Eric having an emergency appendectomy and then his recent hernia surgery. We are quite the pair this year!!! These past few years had really gotten me down and beat me up!! Especially since my body has not cooperated especially since the thyroid cancer. But I think it was a good thing in a way looking back.. I see that I can look at others and really try to understand them or what they are going through. To try and no judge them without knowing their whole story. It is easy to look in from the outside and say you do this, you do that, but to live it is different. Giving loving advice that comes from the heart is great, but support is better:) I just want to be a more rounded person and I think everything we go through in life does that if we let it!!! So I am actually really excited to see what 2012 brings to our life. I am sure there will be good and bad. But we will learn from them both:)
May everyone have a very very safe and Happy New Years!!!!!

Off to the hospital

2011-12-28T08:36:00.003-07:00

Well today is Eric's hernia surgery. We have to have him there at noon and surgery at 1. It is always nerve racking no matter how easy the procedure. Hate that he has to go through any of this but he needs to get them fixed. Then he will have 2 weeks off and then light duty. That will kill us with no income and such for that long but GOD is good and we will make it all work!! Praying for it to go well and for his recovery to be quick!!!

Hope y'all had an awesome christmas!!

2011-12-27T15:49:00.003-07:00

Our Christmas was great!! It is usually hard to be away from those we love as it was this year also but this year was really really nice. Being just the two of us was kind of nice:) Eric worked a part day on Christmas Eve and then we went up to Aspen. We walked around and seen all the Christmas decor and celebrities in town for the holiday:) Kind of fun to see them just out shopping. But the poor people had to deal with all the rude paparazzi. But still fun to see them out in an everyday setting. Then it got dark and my parents had sent us $50.00 to do something fun for Christmas so we took a carriage ride around aspen to look at all the Christmas lights. It was so romantic and wonderful. An AWESOME memory for this Christmas Eve!!! I will never forget that:)

Christmas we spent most of the day cooking the turkey and then the rest of the meal. We played some games and then shared dinner with an old neighbor that stopped in to say merry Christmas. He didn't have anywhere he was going and he is alone so it was nice to have him stay for a Christmas dinner and of course to watch the yearly movie "A Christmas Story":) Just a perfect Colorado Christmas:)

Tomorrow Eric will have his surgery so I am just taking a break to write this from cleaning the house and preparing for that. We will be taking it easy this New Years eve weekend since he will still be not 100%. May your new years eve weekend be amazing and may the New Year bring everyone many blessings and love and great memories!!!!

Merry Christmas Y'all!!!

2011-12-25T12:13:00.003-07:00

Hope everyone is having a VERY VERY Merry Christmas!!! This has been an awesome one for the both of us!! This time of the year is usually hard being away from those we love, and it still is but this year has been great. We have just enjoyed each other and what the season is really all about!! We went to aspen yesterday afternoon and evening and then today I am making a big Christmas dinner and we are going to watch A Christmas Story:) May all you be as blessed as we are today!!! We may not have much but we have each other and that is EVERYTHING:)

Yearly Cowboy Christmas Prayer!!

2011-12-23T10:11:00.001-07:00

I ain't much good at prayin',
and You may not know me, Lord—
For I ain't much seen in churches,
where they preach Thy Holy Word.
But you may have observed me
out here on the lonely plains,
A-lookin' after cattle,
feelin' thankful when it rains.

Admirin' Thy great handiwork.
the miracle of the grass,
Aware of Thy kind Spirit,
in the way it comes to pass
That hired men on horseback
and the livestock that we tend
Can look up at the stars at night,
and know we've got a Friend.

So here's ol' Christmas comin' on,
remindin' us again
Of Him whose coming brought good will
into the hearts of men.
A cowboy ain't a preacher, Lord,
but if You'll hear my prayer,
I'll ask as good as we have got
for all men everywhere.

Don't let no hearts be bitter, Lord.
Don't let no child be cold.
Make easy the beds for them that's sick
and them that's weak and old.
Let kindness bless the trail we ride,
no matter what we're after,
And sorter keep us on Your side,
in tears as well as laughter.

I've seen ol' cows a-starvin'—
and it ain't no happy sight;
Please don't leave no one hungry, Lord,
on Thy Good Christmas Night—
No man, no child, no woman,
and no critter on four feet
I'll do my doggone best
to help you find 'em chuck to eat.

I'm just a sinful cowpoke, Lord—
ain't got no business prayin'
But still I hope you'll ketch a word
or two, of what I'm sayin':
We speak of Merry Christmas, Lord—
I reckon You'll agree—

There ain't no Merry Christmas
for nobody that ain't free!
So one thing more I ask You,
Lord: just help us what You can
To save some seeds of freedom
for the future Sons of Man!

Its almost here.... what to do, what to do!!!

2011-12-21T09:21:00.002-07:00

Well Christmas is almost here. We have still not decided what we are going to do. With Eric surgery coming up in a week we thought maybe just get out and take a drive or something. Maybe take a little picnic Christmas dinner lunch and go drive. Anybody have any fun ideas I would love to hear??:) I hope everyone is all ready and that y'all have an extremely blessed Christmas!!!!

Calendars for a great charity!

2011-12-15T15:45:00.002-07:00

It is time again this year for crystal peaks youth ranch calendars. This is an amazing organization that not only helps rescue horses but helps people also. They give these calendars out for donation. It is an awesome charity to help out. Kim has also written several books that are amazing!!! If you can this holiday season please go to their site and order a calendar and donate anything you can. Every little bit helps:)

http://www.crystalpeaksyouthranch.org/Merchandise/2012-calendar/default.aspx

More surgeries

2011-12-15T13:30:00.000-07:00

Well Eric will have to have surgery on the 28th to repair two hernias. They found the one when he was in surgery for his appendix. I know, I know why not fix it then? That was our question to but with all the lawsuits they don't do that stuff anymore. So now he has to go through another surgery. Eric is beyond hating of hospitals and doctors so this is not a good thing for him. He tends to pass out and have seizures at hospitals so we are praying all will go well and that won't happen. So we are just praying it will all go well and no complications. He will be off work for two weeks and then light duty for couple weeks so it is going to be a challenge for us. But GOD is good so all will be fine.
Then when my left arm is doing better and can bare weight, the doctor said I will probably have to have surgery on the right arm. So we shall see.

Amazing Time at Bears-Broncos Game!!!

2011-12-13T10:07:00.004-07:00

This is one of the best Christmas presents ever!!! My dad and I got to see my favorite team the Chicago bears play his favorite team the Broncos at home. This was the most amazing time. Even though my Bears lost:( It was an amazing game to watch live!! That stadium has the most amazing energy. That city does really. Even Saturday in downtown people were just yelling through the streets to each other to go bears or go broncos!!! There were SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO many bears fans that came to see. We even met a guy that flew in from Austria just for the game!! AMAZING!!! This was definitely an amazing experience!!!

Me and dad on the mile high walk around the stadium

This was our view with no zoom on the camera from our hotel room window!!

Hotel VQ was awesome. And older hotel but friendly, easy to walk to game and they had free shuttles everywhere!! And the skybox restaurant at the top was awesome!!

Coors tailgated in our hotel parking lot so free beer for dad and free brats and soda for me:)

Love their statue and fountain going up to the stadium!

Broncos coming onto the field!!!

My favorite of anything opening ceremonies and star spangle banner. They did amazing and even had a flyover as you will see on video. Loved the horse Denver has, she rode him through quite a bit. And they did all the color guard, and had parachuters come into the stadium. AMAZING SHOW!!!!

This was our seats:) Prity good. High enough we could see across the whole field but low enough to see the names and such:) If you look across we sat about where the tunnels come in just to the side. GREAT SEATS:)

It will definetly be a memory for a lifetime. My dad is not just a fan he is a devoted obsessive fan. I really had to start routing for denver because my dad was getting prity sad with it looking so grim:( But it was such an amazing game to see live for sure. I think there be more of those in the future. My dream will be to see them play eachother in chicago:)

An Awesome Christmas present!!

2011-12-09T09:47:00.000-07:00

So my dads dream has always been to see the Denver Broncos play. Well now I only live a few hours from there. So back in the september my mom and grandma, my brother and sister in law and I got to talking and they decided for christmas it would be fun to send me and my dad to a game and that game would be against my team the Chicago Bears:) I was soooooooooooo excited!!! I know my team isn't doing so hot now that cutler messed his hand up:( But still!!! So they are flying my dad in tomorrow and we are staying at a hotel right at mile high stadium and we are going to the game:) It was such an awesome present for both of us:) I will leave in the am and pick my dad up at the aiport since he is flying in from Oregon and then we will be off for a memory of a lifetime:)

Christmas cards are done!

2011-12-07T08:15:00.005-07:00

So It was time again for our annual Christmas card photos! We decided this year to only try and wrestle the dogs with us and then do it outside. We took a nice little drive just up from us a ways and found just a little snow. And then the fun begins with 3 dogs that want to run, sniff and well you know water every plant that exists in the national forest. You will see a little of the fun in the next pics:)

Doesn't He look so excited. He is saying ya right this is going to be an epic fail:)

Next comes the bribery:) Start with that and see if it works!!

Got at least one good picture with him and the boys!! That was after we put the leashes on and Eric got to hold them:)

Then there is the mom goes, mom runs back almost falls getting in her spot and they get up to see what going on! Over and over again!

Why is my arm like that you say? Well we found the secret to making them look, just had to time it right.....

Prity good right! You hit the timer, hit the button, run, squat down count to two and then you throw their treat in front of the camera right before the flash goes off! And Vooohallah!!:)

Even Target got into it. Wanting to say Meowy Christmas:)

And Tonka of course!!!

I couldn't figure out how to get the finished card on here:( I did it through walmart and it wouldn't let me save the image to my computer. I don't have a scanner either. But it turned out prity well. It actually held 6 pics so we have the one of all of us in the snow, one of each of the cats, one of the horses wearing Christmas hats, one of me and Eric in our winter hats and one of some Colorado mountains. It was fun and great memories we can share.!

2011-12-05T15:16:00.001-07:00

Ok who else is obsessed??? I love, love, love this site. I has sooooooooooo many awesome ideas for DIY projects, home decor, etc. And so much you can do yourself and do for cheap. I am just absolutely in love. Now I just wish my arms would work right so I could try some of it:) Great site for Christmas gift and decorating ideas:)

Just can't quit!!

2011-12-03T08:07:00.003-07:00

I know, I know.....Didn't I learn the first time that I can't quit this blog!! I love blogging and I love my fellow bloggers. I just don't want to quit blogging. It has been a great learning experience for me and I realize that we open ourselves up here for new perspectives and sharing. I just can't give that all up:) Please forgive me for thinking I could just leave it all:)

GOD's Peace

2011-11-30T08:34:00.000-07:00

Lately I have been feeling for the first time in a VERY VERY LONG TIME GOD's Peace. He has given me peace even when things are rough and things aren't going well. I love that feeling and had been missing it deeply. It wasn't like I wasn't praying, or spending time with GOD it was just like there was this block between us. I am still not sure what it was but I think it was just time I needed in "the wilderness" to learn somethings about me and GOD and such. It has been so hard the past year or so but I knew that sometime I would be able to look back and see the reasoning for it all. I can't say I see it all right now but I know I will and I definitely feel GOD is closer again:) I feel like I can appreciate things more and him more. Thankfulness is REALLY important. I just can't wait to see where GOD takes me from here. We are hoping to Oregon, to settle some and be closer to those we Love and Love GOD:)

May we all remember that Jesus is the reason for the season:)

Thankful for special friends!!!

2011-11-26T22:13:00.000-07:00

I am soooooooooooooo thankful for good conversations with good friends!!! I have really struggled with saddness, being hurt and such in the last year or so. I have struggled with what life has thrown at me but I found that it has also taught me a lot about myself, others and the LORD!!! I know a lot of my posts have been sad or frustrated but that is what I had been dealing with and going through. I don't want to hide ME! I am an open book about my feelings but it is also nice to hear sometimes how others see you. I have a friend who is soooooooooooo very dear to me and means the world to me and tonight she told me I am strong and a fighter and a good person and it really made me smile. It made my night!! Sometimes just to hear something from others can change you totally. Even a smile from a stranger can change the world for someone. It really reminded me that we have a lot of power in our words, our body gestures, etc. That we can change someones day, night, life, etc. That GOD uses us to do this and sometimes we don't even know it. Or we can't know the extent that we do. I know this friend knows I love her and she is special to me, but I don't know that she will ever know the extent in which she has changed my life. I know we all feel that way about someone or someone's. But I want to be that person that can help others and make a difference in their life for the LORD!! I am just so thankful for those few people in my life that are my TRUE DEEP FRIENDS!!!!!

Happy Thanksgiving!!

2011-11-24T11:32:00.000-07:00

Hope everyone has a VERY blessed Thanksgiving. May it be full of love, laughter and great memories. I am SOOOOOO VERY thankful for all you. You have changed my life in many ways. Thanks for always being there for me. I love you and am grateful for y'all everyday!!!

Thankful for a special family!!!

2011-11-23T07:36:00.000-07:00

I am sooooooooo very thankful for the time with a very special family I got to live with before I met Eric. I cannot begin to even say how much living with them meant and all that it taught me. But for the first time in my life I had a REAL family. I miss them dearly, especially now with Thanksgiving tomorrow. But I will never forget them, their kindness, our memories and how Thankful I am that GOD put us all together!!!

Today I am thankful for......

2011-11-15T07:49:00.000-07:00

Today I am Thankful that I have the LORD!!! Thankful that he is in control. Thankful that no matter what I have hope in him. I know my future will be glorious no matter the circumstances on this earth. Thankful that no matter how many times I let him down he is always there to pick me back up. That he loves me for me, no matter what!!!

A Goodbye:(

2011-11-13T22:06:00.002-07:00

Just wanted to say goodbye to all my blog friends. It is time for me to close my blog. I just want to say thank you to everyone that I have met on here. You have affected my life in one way or another and it helps me to grow. I will keep up on all your blogs and what is going on in your life. I know some of you I have on facebook. So if I don't have ya on facebook and you want to stay in touch please comment or message me so I can ad your email and such. May your lives be extremely blessed. And have a very happy blessed holiday season!!! I will miss y'all!!

I'm Thankful for.......

2011-11-13T12:00:00.000-07:00

On facebook a lot of us have been doing a today I am thankful for..... I thought it would be a great thing to also write on my blog and share.

Today I am thankful for those who love you for who you are and are there for you when you need them but also allow you to be there for them when they need you. For good friends and family!!!

Fun on Halloween:)

2011-11-01T08:43:00.005-06:00

We went out to a costumer party at one of local places on Saturday. It was a lot of fun even though I couldn't dance yet with my arm. There was a lot of fun people and some fun costumes:) Here is some of the fun pics!

Trying to be happy but serious pirates:)

I don't make a very mean pirate just look peeved off:)

He was not happy that the make up didn't come off well:) He is a great sport!

Hilarious costumes:)

The guy behind us had a freaky costume

Hilarious guy and loved his belt buckle you could tell I had to squat to be the same height:) Amazon girl here:)

A hilarious craiglsist ad- good laugh for the day:)

2011-10-28T16:33:00.003-06:00

Below is why people should proof read:) I know I mess up a lot but this one is prity hilarious. I am sure they ment gentle:)

western slope craigslist > for sale / wanted > farm & garden

genital paint gelding - $1800 (fruita)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Date: 2011-10-28, 2:53PM MDT
Reply to: sale-jbjtv-2664910259@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Eight years old 15 hands genital broke runs to meet you at the gate shoes loads crosses water has never spooked while I was riding him. Call 970 858 three five three one

•Location: fruita
•it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

Trying to stay positive with all going on!

2011-10-28T09:39:00.003-06:00

So I learned long ago not to say whats going to happen next. Even though I don't say it guess what......the crap just keeps happening. I try to stay positive and look at the good things I have but it is so hard sometimes. It is just hard to try so hard and to have Eric work so hard to get NOWHERE. Yes the job is nice for pay but with the cost of living here and trying to get things caught up that need it like car repairs, doctors, etc that doesn't leave anything for back bills or the unexpected things that come up. Don't think I don't know everyone struggles with this cause I know they do. I just wish one thing could work out well and just give us a chance to get caught up and then work on getting some savings. With that rental house not working out and this one is a mess with where the horses are(poor Eric has already fallen twice now trying to feed when it was rainy) we are REALLY trying to find a different rental soon but not a lot available now and then yesterday the car decided it wants to die:( One of the lifters is going bad so now we have to scramble to find another cheap car. Just a lot going on and when I don't feel well and arms are hurting makes my patience thin to say the least. I have never been so impatient as in this last year but I think the years and years of pain and sickness on top of life is finally just got me down:( I keep praying and trying really hard to kick my attitude but I just don't know what to do anymore. Just keep going and doing what we can and hope it doesn't end in an even bigger disaster! I know GOD is control and I know I will look back one day and see the reason for all this but it is just hard now. I know there is a lot worse and I thank GOD everyday for the good I do have so that is what I will continue to do. I usually write the downer stuff in my other blog but thought I would share my thoughts with my blogger friends:)

kitty gone wild and grandma gets staples

2011-10-22T08:31:00.004-06:00

So here is what happened with my Grammy while she was here. I had gone in and cleaned the Kitty's litter box, fed them and such and petted them. I opened their windows a crack and left. About 5 min or so later I went to go outside to start the car since we were leaving for my physical therapy and hit Tonka on my way out with the door and he took off around the house. "what the, why are you out?" go around and see he had pulled the window open further and then pushed the corner of the screen out. He was all scared and puffing and that is not like him. SOOOO Stupid me I reached down to grab him and put him away as I have done a few times before and he went psycho kitty on my rear. He jumped on my other arm and scratched the heck out of me:( He has never done anything like that so my grandma comes out to see why I had hollered I told her he scratched me and he did....blood was dripping everywhere. Well we live way to close to the road so I ran in to get the kennel and my grandma was still outside. As I come out the door I see her by the fence hollering and she said he got me to. I look up and she has blood running down her forehead, way more than what a kitty could have done. So she runs in and washes her head really quickly while I get Tonka in the kennel and put him in his room where 5 minutes later of course he is fine. We think he might have gotten chased by one of the Ferrel cats that hangs around since he was SO SCARED! So I go inside to check on grandma and she says look and as I look I see a couple little scratches and then a cut about 3 1/2 inches long and really deep all laid open. I ask her what happened and she said she picked him up and you know cats he climbed right up her. I said he couldn't have cut you like that so we get her ready to go to ER and I go outside to investigate and realize when she bent down to get him off her head she hit the barbed wire fence and that is what sliced her. So a trip to the ER some nice Dr's, a tetanus shot, and 7 staples in her head and we were back home. Never did hurt much she said just started to itch as it healed. What a crazy weird thing to have happen. My kitty tried to apologize in kitty purrs and grandma forgave him but we know just to get the kennel if he is scared. Lessons you learn the hard way. I have known that with cats but no matter if he was scared he has never done that before so it better not happen again or he will be claw less!

Not moving yet:(

2011-10-21T09:17:00.003-06:00

Well we aren't going to move yet:( The house we were sooooooooooo in love with won't workout. they didn't want horses on the property. Wish they just would have said that upfront but oh well. We were possibly going to board the horses but why have em if I can't even see them and then it would have cost us more than we are paying now and we want to get cheaper not more. We need to be able to do better not worse so we decided to just keep looking and see what we can find. Just REALLY would like to find it before winter! But we will see.

Other than that nothing to exciting. Just getting excited for Halloween. I love Halloween and I love to dress up! I am going as a buccaneer this year and Eric a rouge pirate:) I am not sure where we are going yet but we will find somewhere fun I am sure. Just fun to get out and be something you aren't for a day:)

Crazy around here lately!!

2011-10-19T09:12:00.003-06:00

So it has been crazy past two weeks. My grandma came in on the 8th and left the 17th with Staples in her head(that will be a post all its own soon) and then we have been trying to find a different rental before winter. This place is alright but the only way down to the horses to feed, ect is down a hill that gets very slippery when wet or snowy and I fell countless times last year being careful and can't afford to have that happen this year with my arms:( We have looked at so many but over the past two weeks we have really been trying to get one. It was AWESOME and perfect it was just a couple acres with a really nice house and like 3 miles or so from Eric's work. But then finally yesterday we got the call that said they were not allowing horses as when they subdivided the 80 acres or whatever into 4 parcels they agreed not to allow livestock of any kind. REALLY!?!?!? so I am beyond bummed. But my husband still wants to rent the house and board the horses which I am REALLY not keen on. I would rather just find a different place all together. But we will see what happens. So it has just been looking places, physical therapy and waiting.

Its SNOWING on October 6th WTF?!?!?!

2011-10-06T16:18:00.003-06:00

So yes it is October 6th and it is snowing here. It isn't sticking right here but just about 1500 feet above us is. It is beautiful and I love the snow but it is so hard on the animals especially the horses to go back and forth from warm to cold, etc. Next week will be upper 60's and 70's but 30's at night. Pringle coliced this spring and since he wasn't impacted or anything my guess was just the crazy weather changes so now it makes me nervous. So I am watching them carefully!!! Its gonna change whether we are ready or not:)

Missing riding sooooooooo much!! Feeling a tug!

2011-10-01T12:32:00.002-06:00

I have really missed riding A LOT!!! I of course haven't been able to do anything with my horse other than look at her and give her treats and a few pets since I have been injured but it has been longer than that since I have really ridden her. She is older and has some soundness issues that I really don't feel comfortable putting my fat self on her for long. I need to get a vet out and have her looked over and see what they think but really she is only going to be an easy rider if that. I miss REALLY riding! I use to ride all the time. That was my thing to keep my peace:) I loved showing and barrel racing and all that fun stuff. I am feeling a Tug to want to get back into it. A huge part of me just feels dead. But right now we just can't do it. So I guess it is just more incentive to take care of my arms so they heal properly and to really be disciplined in spending and such to try to set it up so we can get a couple of good, broke, ready to enjoy horses and be able to give them everything they need. I would love more than anything to do a drill team for rodeos or even the simplest to carry the flag at the opening of the rodeo, that is a huge dream for me:) I know so silly but I LOVE IT!!! I also would love to ride in parades and such again. So for now dream, dream, dream:)

YAY its October:)

2011-10-01T11:41:00.004-06:00

I love, love, love October!!! I love the warm days and cool mornings and nights. I love the color of all the leaves and brush and such changing. I love HALLOWEEN!!! Yes Halloween in is my favorite holiday. I love to dress up and be something I am not for a day:) This year we are going to be pirates! I had to pick something "manly" husband said so he was good with the pirates:) Plus my favorite anything is Pumpkin-pumpkin ice cream, pumpkin muffins, pumpkin coffee, etc so it is a good month:)

Our 2nd anniversary!!

2011-09-28T08:32:00.005-06:00

So Monday was our 2nd wedding anniversary. I love that man more than anything and more everyday!!! We have a plan to visit a different state every anniversary. Well since we really couldn't afford to do much we did our Colorado one this year:) Guess good thing we moved to this state:) Sunday we got up early and drove up through Glenwood Springs to Carbondale and drove to Redstone, marble, and went on a dirt road to Crestted Butte and then around Gunnison, Montrose and back up to I-70 and home. It was an amazingly beautiful drive to take this time of year. All the brush and aspens are changing colors and it just made it stunning. We stopped at a few of the little towns and just enjoyed the atmosphere and learned some history in marble, co. Which is where the marble for the Lincoln memorial and other federal landmarks came from. It was just nice to get away and enjoy each others company. We truly truly LOVE each other, but more than that we LIKE each other:) Now we are working on 3 years:) and have many, many, many more to go!!!! Thank you LORD for putting this man beside me in this life!!

I love aspens!!! They are just the prettiest when they change color and I love the sound as the leaves dry and clank together. So I took a TON of pics of them:)

Eric standing in the doorway of what use to be one of the 70ft. marble walls to keep fires from spreading if they were to break out at marble, CO.

on a dirt road between paonia and crested butte area.

pinnacle cliffs on the gunnison reservoir. It was just such an awesome view!

A LONG shot on a great place for us.....Maybe a home finally?

2011-09-22T21:07:00.004-06:00

Ok so it is a HUGEEEEEEEEEEEEE long shot but we found a place listed here for 189,900. It is a 2002 hud manufactured home with 4 bedrooms and actually is really nice for a mobile home which I usually hate. But I LOVEEEEEEEE this one. It is on 35 acres. It is only about 15 minutes from erics work and a little ways out of town but not hours from everything. Now that seems like a lot to people like us from S.dakota, Nebraska:) but around here this price is UNHEARD of. Everything with 5 acres or more is averaging 299,900 or more. We have been looking and it is crazy. IT also has the most amazing views. Now with or credit and such it is prity much impossible, but GOD does great things. So we are going to atleast see if there is anything we can do. I mean if not atleast we know we tried and what we need to do to make it happen later. But I am absolutely in love already!! I know bad, bad, bad. But gotta start somewhere to see what we got to do. First we have the personal loans and then this. So we will see what happens. I am putting some pics from the website but they don't do it much justice. Just lots to work with over the next years to make it a real home for us and all the critters:) I know it is a long shot but just got try. Never know:)

The side of the house

The couple little sheds for eric storage-plus you can't see it well but a dog run that is prity good sized and actually has a door to the back part of the right shed that has a little dog house built in.

Just part of the amazing views from here. It is such a beautiful place and walking thru the junipers and sage was so nice. There is already some parts cleared and ready to make a pasture and as time goes we can improve and plant more pasture and cut trails and such. It is just such a cool piece of land in a perfect spot for us.

The simple joys in life

2011-09-22T12:52:00.003-06:00

I have always been the most bubbly,upbeat, easing going person in life. But the last couple years have really beat me down. One thing after another, after another, after another...you get the point has taken its toll on me and more specifically my joy and attitude. I don't want to keep having that problem, life is way toooooooooooo short!!! I need to remember the simple joys.
This morning when I woke up I looked out into the pasture and seen my baby girl Shar standing there sleeping in the morning sun. I just love that horse. It is so hard to see her getting older and not to be able to ride her, show her and compete on her like the old days. I trusted this horse with my life and truly felt the most amazing peace and joy when I was riding her. So I put some treats in my pocket and walked down to love on her and spoil her. Which I haven't done enough of since I hurt my arm. It was just the perfect fall morning and her sweet soft muzzle against my hand made me smile. It made me realize how much I truly miss the horse world and being involved with horses daily. I even love cleaning stalls just to be around them. They bring a joy I can't explain and I know you horse girls understand:)
I just want to spend more time enjoying the simple. I just wish I could do more for her. But I am going to enjoy what I can do and love her. And Mr. Pringle:)
Thank you LORD for the everyday in our lives. Please help me to see it all more and to appreciate it and love it and see the joy in it all:)

cleaning up our mess and making a future

2011-09-20T11:06:00.003-06:00

So last night I found a listing on line for a house near erics work and it had 35 acres with it. So for fun we went and looked at it. NOT a good idea because of course we really really liked it and it is actually pretty affordable for this area:) But it did really help us to decide we really need to look into things and how to go about getting our future in order. Our past is a mess full of huge mounting medical bills and a foreclosure from all of it. So it is a mess. I am an open book so I don't try and hide things and some of it was just plain sh*$ty luck and some was bad choices I am not about to blame all our trouble on life. But it is frustrating and now we find ourselves wanting to start to really build a future to have a place that is home that we feel like home. We are paying way to much in rent where we are. It was a great place at the moment as we didn't have time to go looking and be picky. But we don't want to saddle ourselves with it next year. We want to be able to put money away for a down payment. With our foreclosure it looks like it will be minimum 2 years before we can really look at anything so for now we just need to put our nose to the grindstone. And before even that we have some private loans to some that WE WANT WANT WANT to get paid back. Those are my priority and with me out with my injury and eric out with his appendix for so long that really put a damper on income for those sooner. But I don't care what it takes those got to get paid ASAP. So private loans first, emergency funds, medical bills, and such. We just want to get where we are not worrying all the time. Get our cars fixed from all their problems, have emergency money for things and the animals:), Get enough hay put away for winter, etc. We just want to be responsible and enjoy life not dread what is around the corner.
I just want to share these things to look back in a couple years and hopefully see a huge change in things in our life:)

Drastic Change!!!

2011-09-18T17:42:00.006-06:00

Ok so I did it! I cut my hair. I will be honest that I don't know what I think of it yet. It was just so damaged from everything. I was scared to death to do it. I know why? It grows back right? Well that is what I am afraid of. First time it started to get long was when I had the gas explode on me and burn me all over and burned my hair mostly off and we had to shave it, then it started to get long and I lost most of it with all the cancer drugs, and then since it has fallen out and regrown, and fallen out and regrown because of my thyroid levels being so all over the place. I know it is just hair, but for me it helps me to feel more feminine:) Silly I know but hey. Well it was sooooooooooooo damaged and since I can't use my other arm and my husband can't put hair in a pony tail to save his life this will be easier to actually brush myself:) We will see:)

before and afters

Recovery is happening but slowly!!

2011-09-17T09:17:00.003-06:00

Well my surgery was 10 days ago now. It is very painful and then I got pneumonia from the surgery to. So to say it has been trying and frustrating is an understatement. It is like starting all over again. No using my left arm, in a brace, lots of ice, physical therapy and 3 months till I can use it all the way. Then since my other arm was injured also and now has been my only usable arm for 2 1/2 months it is extremely painful. MY doctor says I am not allowed to use it except for basics, eating, etc. OK ya that isn't good as my house is beyond needing cleaned and is driving me CRAZY CRAZY CRAZY. He says my husband has to do everything. I know, I know every woman's dream, well not mine. I hardly even see my husband lately. He is working long, long, hours. I am not complaining by any means as we really need the income. With him being out for surgery, me being out for all this and surgery it REALLY screwed up all our income to get loans paid back and get ready for winter and all that. So now I just have to try and be not so frustrated with the mess around me:(
It is just very hard not being close to any friends and family. It makes it a big challenge. But hey that is life and I am living it as best I can:) I have a few posts I need to do but one handed typing is hard so maybe in a day or two:)

Goes to show impossible is possible-amazing barrel racer

2011-09-06T08:32:00.007-06:00

Here is a video of an amazing girl who is paralyzed from the waste down from a car accident and is barrel racing only little over a year later. Makes you think about how much we can truly do if we put our heart and mind to it.

Description:
Amberley Snyder was paralyzed in an auto acccident. This bright young girl is a high school rodeo champion and past Utah State FFA chapter president. The daughter of ex-major league ball player Cory Snyder. She has gone to be an inspiration to many as she makes her comeback to rodeo. She is still paralyzed but is still determined to live her rodeo dream by competing in the WPRA barrel racing.

The 2011 Spanish Forks Fiesta Days Rodeo is part of the PRCA Wrangler Silver Tour series. It attracts some of the top rodeo contestants in the world.

This year's event featured both present and past world champions along with many of the current leaders in the world championship standings for the PRCA.

Its official.....Surgery!

2011-09-01T18:34:00.004-06:00

So I went to the orthopedic doctor today and he says the surgery will be done next Wednesday the 7th. I am not happy about surgery but if it fixes my arm then I would be happy. So hopefully it all goes well and hopefully we don't have any complications with the nerves. I wish they would have just done it sooner, but with Workman's comp they have to prove they really tried without the surgery. I will have the surgery and then start all over with the brace and physical therapy. I won't be able to do my regular stuff for about 3 months:( But we will see how it all goes.
I am up for a full time opening in the streets department at work but I am really hoping that I can still get it since I won't be able to be fully useful for 3 months. We will have to see. It would be awesome if I could get the job as it would be full time, decent pay and BENEFITS!!! Yes that would change a lot for us.
I just want to get back on track of trying to get back on top of things financially. We were doing really well and had hoped by today that we would have some personal loans paid and a few bills but with my arm and reduced workers comp salary and then Eric's appendicitis and no work and then reduced work that really gave us a punch in the gut. So hopefully this will be the start of trying to get back where we need to be. We have had some very very awesome people help us out and it makes me very frustrated and sad not to have it paid back and settled by now. So LORD please help us with that:)
I hope everyone has an awesome Labor day weekend. I have my mom, dad and grandma driving in tomorrow and staying till Tues am. So it should be a weekend of fun:)

Heaven is for REAL!!!!

2011-08-30T07:57:00.004-06:00

I just started and finished this book in one sitting yesterday!!! It is amazing and it changed a lot for me. It is about a little boy who has emergency surgery for life threatening issues and he goes to heaven during the surgery. It is an amazing story and one that will definitely change some things for you. Especially if you have ever lost a baby to miscarriage I would definitely recommend this story. It is a book I definitely recommend!!!

looking like surgery:(

2011-08-27T09:16:00.003-06:00

So my physical therapist and the doctor talked yesterday and they are both agreeing on surgery. So I will have my pre-op appt next Thursday and then surgery on the 7th. They said this will be like starting all over again but that it will heal much faster!! SO that part is good, but I am just frustrated with it being so long:( but at least it will be healed proper. There is a lot of complication risks with this surgery but I am trusting GOD to guide the Dr. hand. So we will see how it all works out.

Thanks for every ones comments on the whole kids thing. I am still so confused. Is anyone really ever truly "ready"? Do people not really think about how they will do it? etc? I am just going to pray and if the LORD decides it is time he can make it happen:) Thanks for every ones comments.

Wanting your thoughts! Have kids? or not have kids?

2011-08-25T21:09:00.003-06:00

Ok so we are back to this again:) When I was back home for my visit of course everyone is asking when we will have kids. And me I just don't know. Part of me wants to and part of me doesn't. It makes me feel so bad as there are others who would give anything to have kids and can't and here I sit not knowing. I also don't know with my health if I would be able to get pregnant. I am just worried maybe I am to selfish, maybe I wouldn't make a good mom, maybe I couldn't give them the life they deserve, etc. etc. etc. I know my husband would love to have kids but he doesn't pressure me. I just don't want to regret my decision either way. I just feel more pressure now as that I am getting older and also I would want my baby to grow up around those their age and everyone is pregnant now or just had babies. Seriously like 4 babies in last month and 6 pregnant now. I guess my other hindrance is that we are here all alone. I don't want my kid to be lonely. I wouldn't have people I love and trust to turn to if I needed the help as a new mother. I know these are probably things everyone worries about and I know everyone says it is different when you have your own. I know I need to trust GOD and that children are a blessing from him. But I would really love to hear from y'all on this. Kids? no kids? and just your thoughts!!!

GOD has made such stunning places!

2011-08-23T20:38:00.005-06:00

(Hanging Lake, Glenwood Springs CO.)

Saturday I decided I wanted to get out and be brave with my arm still hurting:) I figured if I make it worse than it REALLY needs surgery for sure. So I found a picture of hanging lake online and wanted to go. It said about an hour and a half round trip and 1.2 miles. I was like no prob that would be an easy hike. Well I get there and see the sign that says "difficult" well different states have different ideas of difficult:) This state knows difficult.

This is just the first part of the trail all rock and really not much of a trail. But it was an awesome, awesome hike and I was actually prity proud of how well I did it and that I wasn't totally exhausted. And we did it in a quick time. It is 1.2 miles but goes up like 1,102 feet in that 1.2 miles. So it is a lot of switch backs. but it does follow the most beautiful dead horse creek.

Which as you can see here makes some of the most beautiful water falls all along it. I could fill this post with hundreds of pictures of this creek and different falls. It was so clean and clear and the sound was so relaxing.

This was the view from almost the top. Yes we started out below all those cliffs at the bottom where the Colorado river runs so it was a long ways up.

This is the falls that feeds hanging lake. This is called spouting rock as you can kind of see on the right fall it comes directly out of the rock cliffs.

This is hanging lake. It is so beautiful. You cannot fish or go in the water. It has special minerals and such that make it its own eco-system and it would destroy it if people were to get in it or such. It is so clear and it is full of some of the most beautiful trout. Which Handsome just thought was cruel that I would make him watch them but no fishing:)

Almost looks like some other country don't it:)

This the view from above the lake at spouting rock falls. It was just such an awesome day. It helped to remind me that there is so much out there that GOD made for me to enjoy and it wasn't even that far from us:) I want to spend more time enjoying those little moments and spending such awesome time with my husband whom I love sooooooo much!!! It is just nice to get away and enjoy the little things.

Not the best news and some possible opportunities

2011-08-22T09:04:00.003-06:00

So many posts I need to get working on. I had my doctor appt last Thursday and it wasn't the news I had wanted to hear:( I thought things were going how they wanted. I am still in tons of pain and can't work or anything but I thought that was the process. Well then he says I will give you two more weeks and then surgery:( What where did that come from thought it was going like it should? He scheduled the surgery for the 7th so we will see on the 1st at my next doctors appt what he thinks.

With all this going on right in the middle of it my husbands work is hiring an inventory-parts person and so I applied. It would be an awesome paying job with yes BENEFITS:) Can you see the excitement on my face!!! I couldn't pass it up. But they do know that due to my injury I can't do any lifting with my left arm. I am suppose to find out this week if I get the job. I am not going to hold my breath as they had quite a few internal people apply and lots of others. So we will see what GOD does:)

I gotta get better about my post being more often. But really since we have gotten out of the ranching my life doesn't seem to have near as much excitement:) Gosh do I miss ranching with all my being.

An Awesome surprise

2011-08-16T10:22:00.004-06:00

Well on the 10th I got an awesome surprise that I needed SOOOOOOOOOOO very much!!! I was so sad I was going to miss my cousins wedding and I was getting so very home sick(which like never happens to me) and it was making me so bummed and one of my cousins facebooked me and offered to pay my trip out. I was touched sooooooooooooo much!!! I was so excited so the next morning I booked my trip and left that day for Portland airport. My best friend and my little "niece" picked me up. It was soooooooooooo awesome to see them. I spent 7 days in Oregon with my family and friends and it was something I desperately needed. I have some very awesome, very GOD loving people back there that I can truly talk to and get that advice that you know is coming from the best place. I miss them sooooooooooooo dearly. I want to move back to Oregon soooooooooo bad in some ways but then when I am there I really don't miss being far enough away from all the petty family/friend drama. It really gave me a chance to just think and breath. It was exactly what I needed.

It was awesome to see my cousin get married, I also got to be with my best friend of 22 years for her grandmas 75th bday party. She is like a grandma to me so that was special and she was so excited that I made it. It is just nice to be there for those special things for sure. To see all the kids that grow so quickly. To just see how GOD is working in some of their lives to see such great things happening for people that have been so faithful to him. It was definitely a great trip. It really helped to adjust my attitude some. Which I DEFINITELY needed, it has really stunk.

Now I need to catch up on every ones blogs:) Miss y'all!! Arm still not healing well so off to physical therapy and then Thursday the doctor again. I really hope we can get it better. would much rather be at work:)

so it is torn:(

2011-08-02T18:23:00.003-06:00

So I FINALLY got the results of what is wrong with my arm. The bicep muscle and tendon are partially torn:( They are hoping no surgery and that physical therapy will fix it. So no work still for at least another 3 weeks:( At least now I know but still not fun. Eric getting better and has doctor appt tomorrow, we are praying they will allow him to go back to work and that they will ok him to work with his hernia until a later date so we can do the surgery like December or something. So we will see.
Other than that just not much going on. Lots of cabin fever!!!! Even my doctor said I needed a vacation:) He said you are beyond stressed out every muscle in your body seems tense. He says he understands with all that is going on, if it were him he would run away:) I told him I would if I could:) At least for a week or so to Oregon to see my cousin get married and visit with everyone. But sadly just a dream.
Thank you to everyone who is praying, it means a lot and is much needed and appreciated. I wish I would have started blogging earlier so people could have known me before I had gotten so beaten down by all this. I try to be upbeat, positive and such but it is hard sometimes with everything all at once and for sooooooooooo long!

Just missin the ranch life

2011-07-30T20:09:00.003-06:00

We are missing ranch life something terrible. You know you just know when you belong or when something is just right. Well that was definitely just right for us. But unfortunately we hadn't found the just right ranch yet. We miss it fiercely and everyday I think of all that we are missing. We were so blessed to get to live that life and I hope that we will get to get back to it. It is a blessing to have a job that pays well, but it is also very stressful here with cost of living being so high. We will just pray and see where the LORD leads us. I was just looking at pics that made me smile. There are tons but here are a few I have saved on the computer close at hand:)

Eric really wants to have a chance to learn more roping skills and ride a lot more!!!

Oh how I love the babies!! This is one that had the bag over her face and almost didn't make it. New mom!!! She finally came back to find her baby!

yes that is me driving the tractor!! I love tractors and I definitely think they are sexy:) hee hee!!!

Eric holding bitty!! She was just way to cute!!!

One thing after another!!

2011-07-27T13:20:00.003-06:00

I would love to be writing fun, adventurous, cute posts at this point, any posts other than complaining and unhappiness. But really right now life has just been one bad thing or frustrating thing after another!! I am trying to stay positive and I realize I am blessed with my husband and pets and still being alive. I try to be thankful for what I have but it is so hard when everything else just falls apart constantly.
So my arm is still in its brace and very painful and will be getting its MRI today and that is after one trip to the er because I couldn't breathe well and was having sharp stabbing pains in my chest that wouldn't go away. Guess that is thanks to the brace and arm being messed up it caused inflammation and swelling in my chest muscles and sternum:( PAINFUL!!! so needless to say I have not been working.
Then Sunday Eric said his stomach kind of hurt I said sick he said no just a pain here and pointed to lower right side. I questioned him about a few things and how long and such. and I said I think you have appendicitis. He said ya right lets go get the hay. So we go and on the way his pain gets worse and worse and stubborn man wouldn't turn around and go to doctor so we got hay and then he admitted he needed to go to ER so away we go. We get there and they say he needs to go to urgent care as they are way over slammed with an OD they don't know what they OD on and such. We ask if it appendicitis will they just send him back here and she said yes. She asked symptoms and then said yep probably right better stay here. I tell nurse since she is getting ready to do blood that she can't do it with him sitting in chair he will pass out and go into seizure she doesn't listen and before she even gets the stuff out bad he goes white and blue and into seizure. So they put him in a bed and from there we get ct and then emergency surgery. So lots of hospital time and me having to run back and forth to take care of dogs and such. I am just sooooooooooooo beyond grateful he is ok. But he still having a lot of pain:( I am beyond exhausted from lack of sleep, stress and tons of pain since I cant take the pain killers with all my driving around and ib profen and such not even touching it. SO as you can see lots of stress and worry. Not to menchin neither of us working and no income for the the next paycheck will ad to any ones worries. Oh well I am just glad my husband is ok and that is all that matters.
hopefully the next post will be a better one. Hope everyone is well. I soooooooooooo need to catch up on my blogs!!!

Injury and crazyness!!

2011-07-17T08:36:00.006-06:00

So it has just been crazy at work and at home lately. We have lost two guys at work now and so it has been a two man crew which is A LOT of work and hard on the body. We have to lift huge sets of bleachers to mow over at work and guess what I injured my arm. We figured I just pulled the muscle so I didn't weed eat for a couple days and iced and rested it and no better got worse so Friday they sent me to the doctor and then the orthopedist where he thinks I might have torn my bicep or tendon:( To say it hurts is a understatement. I have to be in this huge brace that keeps my arm at a 90 degree angle at all times, even to bed and in a week I have to have an MRI when inflammation down some. GRRRRRRRRRRRR this is not what I needed. Now our mow crew down to one guy and really nothing I can do with only one arm. I realize it workers comp but doesn't pay as much as if I work so I am asking them to find me anything..pulling weeds...picking up trash, anything to do. I really need to keep working so we can get a couple more big bills and a loan payed off that I really want to take care of. Here is a picture of my lovely arm and swollen hands.

But on a good note my grandparents stopped into visit last weekend and we all went to the rifle airshow which was totally awesome and amazing. They did some really cool stuff. It was just so nice to get to see my grandparents. I really miss my friends and family that are important to me. I really wish I could be in Oregon closer to all them. I just feel like I miss out on so much without them. Below are some airshow pics. I know this very busy post but with work and such I am so beyond tired and sick by the time I get home I just want to sleep. Also found out my blood pressure way to high WHAT!?!?!? So now I got to get an appt scheduled for that to see what up with that but would explain the headaches and chest pains and such. I hope everyone else is well. I gotta catch up with my blog reading.

B-25 bomber. Wish I could have rode in this thing. $395 for half an hour ride. But wow what an amazing piece of history. Aaron tippen flew it in himself for his concert and sang on the wing. What an amazing show!!!

Grandma and papa and eric checking out one of the many awesome planes.

aaron tippen singing on the wing. Amazing amazing patriot and a really awesome entertainer.

the jet powered school bus!!! this was awesome I have video on my facebook. The end they did some awesome pyro technics with it!!!

Jet powered outhouse!!! This was hilarious but this little thing could have been speeding on the interstate!!! FAST!!!

Getting past the hurt?

2011-06-29T17:47:00.003-06:00

How do y'all get past the hurt that others have caused you?? I mean directly and indirectly caused you? I find I have been hurt very deeply by people I love very dearly and It bothers me and makes me sad a lot. I know you can't change others and you can't make them care but how do you let it go or get over it?? Just thought I would see what y'all think.

crazy week with pets!!!

2011-06-25T13:11:00.003-06:00

I wish I had pics and video for this post. Kohanna is doing much better. Thanks for all the thoughts and prayers. He is my baby and had me prity worried. He no longer has a fever and seems to slowly be getting back to himself. Giardia itself is not necessarily deadly but its effects can be. It can cause severe diarrhea which leads to dehydration and it also causes the small intestines to quit absorbing nutrition so it is prity nasty. We are just doing the best we can to get him better and hoping no one else comes up with it.
Well my other pet causing a ruckus is our cats this week. I went out to feed my horses at 5:20am and heard Tonka meowing, I was talking to him and realized it wasn't coming from his bedroom window, it was coming from a tree!!! YIKES!!! They are indoor kitties only and I look up and the screen is gone on the window. I look in and it is inside and no kitties. I start calling for target and nothing and now I gotta figure out how to get this other silly cat out of the tree. We have had it happen one other night where one of the local Farrel cats jumped through the window and started a ruckus and I had forgotten to close their window before bed so I think that is what happened again. Finally I find Target under the porch and now I got to get Tonka out of tree. I know everyone says just leave em they will come down, well yes they might but he is strictly indoors so he doesn't have a lot of strength in his claws and such since he isn't able to climb trees and such inside. So there is me at 5:30 in the morning climbing the tree and can't get close enough and the poor scared out of his whiskers cat won't come down the steep branch to me. I would have used a ladder but yes they are all still in storage in South Dakota. So me I start thinking and searching and I find a plastic crate and some rope so I tie it so it won't tip and after 3 throws get it up and over the branch he is on. It took about 3 minutes but the stinker actually crawled in the basket and let me lower him down to me. YES I SOOOOOOOOOOOOO needed a video camera at the time. I was almost late for work but at least I had my babies back safe.
So I hope that is all the excitement for a while with the pets. Never dull with all them that is for sure!

giardia...Really!

2011-06-23T14:14:00.005-06:00

Ok I know giardia is around a lot and a lot of people get it. But I didn't realize it was so abundant in dogs. My poor old dog wasn't doing so hot yesterday afternoon. I thought he just got to warm outside. I have him in our huge stock trailer with all the sides out and fans going but he seemed not so hot so I cooled him slowly with water and put him by the fan and took his temp. 104.5:( YIKES!!! started watching him closely and monitoring and it started going down after couple hours and was at 103.1 and he started acting better but this am he was back to 104.1 so it was on the phone to find a vet to see him. Luckily the vet in rifle could have me drop him off and they were awesome so it is nice to know I have a good vet close and reasonably priced, even though it was an expensive visit. Turns out he has giardia and another bacteria so he is on couple antibiotics and pain meds for the cramping. POOR GUY:( So now I have to watch the others and hope they didn't catch it. I am bleaching everything and having to clean the whole yard. Now we are concerned it came from our drinking water:( He hasn't been anywhere in a long while so either our water or out of the ground. But with the river so high and flooding it may have leaked into our well water they said. Probably need to have our water tested. At least we never drink our water. So a missed day of work, a sick dog, and a lot of cleaning equal a not so fun day. But hey I am just sooooooooooo happy it wasn't something worse!!! He is my baby of almost 11 years so him being safe and on the mend is all I need right now!!!

It's fixed I can comment again!!

2011-06-08T20:54:00.002-06:00

Thanks Rachel and GunDiva!!! It worked to just uncheck the stay signed in. How weird. But now I can comment on others again. Thanks sooooooooooooooooo much!!! Life savers:)

Can't comment on others blogs:(

2011-06-08T16:54:00.002-06:00

There have been so many peoples blogs that I have wanted to comment on but blogger won't let me:( I am logged in but when I type the comment and hit send it asks me what profile I select the google one as before and then it asks me to sign in again, so I do and then nothing just keeps doing that. I have tried signing out of blogger and google and then signing back in but nothing. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR:( So please know I am still reading and paying attention.

An awesome day trip!!!

2011-05-30T08:27:00.005-06:00

So Eric decided to take me on a day trip and not tell me where till we got there. Since it was only for the day he decided to stay kind of close and enjoy the beauty we haven't seen around here. So we took I-70 up which is always pretty to hwy 24 got off there and headed towards leadville and then up over Independence pass to aspen and then home. It was some of the most stunning views ever!!! I couldn't believe there was still that much more snow and they even had to clear a avalanche that had slid across the road since opening it a couple days ago. It was crazy!!! To stand at the top of Independence pass and see the Rockies from there was beyond amazing!!! It was just a nice day to get away and forget all the stress going on right now with my job. GOD is so awesome like that:) It was simple but sooooooo nice!

Twin lakes off Hwy 24. SOOOOOOOOO beautiful and the lakes were so clean and clear!

Check out how High the snow still is (no one sneeze)and how appropriately I am dressed for our outing! I didn't know what we were doing obviously!!

They were even clearing an avalanche that just happened. It was kind of scary with all the snow still up there!

walking out to view point at Independence pass I stepped in the wrong spot and yes I was stuck in there prity well.

AMAZING!!!!

Cruise anyone??

2011-05-28T08:52:00.003-06:00

Just dreamin!!! But sounds like sooooo much fun doesn't it! I went on one cruise with some girlfriends in '06. It was amazing and sooooo cheap for the fun you get to have. I have been really wanting to go on another and take my husband. He has never done anything like that so it would be awesome. It is always fun to dream. I am hoping maybe in the next few years we will be doing better and able to do that. I am just happy Eric's been getting more hours lately so we can get some of the pressing payments made. Hoping it keeps up and we can start paying things off and savings and then fun here and there to:) Never know!!!

Long time no post:(

2011-05-21T17:09:00.003-06:00

I know it has been so long since I have posted. I miss all my blogger friends, I got to get caught up on my reading. I hope everyone is well. Guess this is what happens when you have to work full time again, it gets harder to keep up with everything.
Well work has been good all except the weather!!! Rain, rain, rain and then some snow thrown in. It is just the craziest weather and it makes it hard to get all our work done. But hey it is a job and I like it and I am getting paid. It is nice to start getting a few of the bills that are making me panic paid on. Just trying to be very good and just put our money towards the debt. Still wishing Eric's job would pick up a little more. But we do the best we can with what we have.
I have also added going to the little local gym into our lives. I was just beyond done with being fat. I have a long ways to go, but am happy to report down 13lbs so far. I will post pics sometime when I get a good amount lost:) I want to loose 55lbs more. So I am going to watch what I eat and then work out at least 5 days a week plus work. I am really hoping I can get the weight off. I keep teasing my handsome he has to take me on a cruise if I loose all the weight:) Ha! ha! like that is a priority right now but it is fun to tease him.
All the animals are doing prity well even though they don't get enough me time I am sure. But they are awesome and I love them soooooooo very much. It will be nice when weather gets nice and the raging river goes down we can take the dogs down to swim.
Well not much else is up. Hope all is well with everyone else!

p90x anyone? Need advice

2011-05-14T13:50:00.003-06:00

Ok so things are going alright. Love the job but my body is rebelling prity heavily so I just keep on going and hope it shapes up:) And literally would be nice to:) I am trying to get rid of this weight, it is so depressing and frustrating and it is really dragging me down in life so I want to do the best I can to change that. I don't want to just be thin I want to be healthy. My body is not meant to be super skinny but I just want to look in the mirror and not hate what I see. I have had people recommend p90x. Has anyone out there used it? From what I heard it really does get results, but It is prity expensive so I want to see what others think from personal experience. Any help would be greatly appreciated:) Hope all is well with everyone out there. I soooooooo got to get caught up on my blog reading but lately it has been work and so beyond exhausted in bed by 8.

Happy Mothers Day to Everyone!!

2011-05-08T09:41:00.007-06:00

Hope everyone has a very blessed mothers day!!! I know I enjoy being a "mom" to all my "kids":) I know it isn't the same but to me they are my kids and I love them soooooooo very much and they bless my life daily!!!

Missing those that I lost even. I will never forget them and they made my life soooooooooooooooooo much better!!!! I am not sure what being a mother to a kid feels like, but I know I would do anything to make my pets lives better!!

Can't believe it is may already!

2011-05-02T17:09:00.003-06:00

It has been such crazy weather around here...warm one minute, and snowing the next literally. It has made work very interesting. I love the job and I love being outside. It is so beautiful in the area so that makes it nice to. It is defiantly taking all I have. I am exhausted and hoping this cold goes away soon. But it is nice to be making some money cause gosh knows we need it:)
Eric has worked the past 3 Mondays so that is great for more hours and then trying to do work on the side on Sundays also. Just want to get things caught up. We weren't able to get insurance on me:( So that was a huge huge sad bummer, but that is life. It was just to much a month and then we had to pay a $2600 deductible per person and then they paid a 100% after that. Great plan for major problems for sure but bad if you don't have that kind of money. Oh well maybe next year. We are planning on getting rid of this place as soon as our lease is up in Feb. It is just WAY WAY to expensive. We need to be paying like more than half to really be doing anything to get ourselves out of debt. Nothing else really new on the horizon.

I hate the mirror!!!(updates included)

2011-04-30T10:33:00.005-06:00

Ok so I know every woman feels like this at some point! But I feel like this all the time. Not only does the weight part bother me but now it seems like I have aged 1o years in the last few months. I know the stress I am sure hasn't helped but I just feel ugly to be honest. I have never really been one to worry tons about ageing or such but now it is really starting to bother me. Not the number itself but the looks. I know looks aren't everything but ladies lets be honest we all want to be beautiful. We all want to feel good about ourselves and we want to know we look good when we go out and such. I just feel so blah and yuck all the time. My hair is breaking more and more and of course falls out and grows at random from the lovely thyroid issues, my skin is staring to show large pours which I have never had, and thanks to the nasty burn a few years ago it is starting to show some of the scaring especially when I tan and those areas don't sometimes. I just really want to feel good about me. I just wish all the good beauty treatments and such weren't soooo gosh darn expensive. Right now these things aren't a priority unfortunately. So if anyone knows any cheap or secret remedies besides a time machine let me know:)
Work is going well and all though I have been sick and extremely worn out it feels good to get out and work. It feels good to know that I am going to be able to help contribute to the bills and to make this body do some heavy work:) We are just trying to catch up but seems like we just keep falling behind. We will just keep working and doing the best we can to get some things caught up. I know our biggest trap is the house. It is just way to much for us. The payment is huge and as soon as the lease is up we will be finding something different. We had to pass up my insurance as we just couldn't afford to add another $250 bill a month and then it was a $2600 deductible. It made me very sad and frustrated but hopefully next year we can find a cheaper place and be able to add me on then. Thank you everyone for the prayers and the encouragement!!!

Mowing in the snow while sick!!

2011-04-26T17:12:00.003-06:00

Well my new job is still going prity well. I like getting out and doing something, but one of my saving graces the last couple of years is being away from people and the public for the most part so as I haven't gotten sick constantly from colds, flu, etc. But first thing now bam I have a terrible cold:( I am taking lots of vitamins but being autoimmune really doesn't help much. So I am just trying to go to bed early, drink lots of water, and take my vitamins. Mowing in the snow today didn't help I am sure. Yes I said we were mowing in the snow. We are behind from the weather so we were mowing since it wasn't really accumulating yet. CRAZY!! wish I had my camera it was entertaining to see:) Hope everyone had a great Easter!!!

Happy Easter!!!

2011-04-23T16:01:00.005-06:00

Hope everyone has a very happy and blessed Easter!!! I know we will be remembering what Jesus did for us that day!

The third dog wanted nothing to do with the ears:)

OHHHHHHHHH the pain!!!

2011-04-20T20:32:00.003-06:00

Oh soooooooo much pain!!! I didn't even know most of those muscles existed. My new job is going well but after 7 hours of weedeating today and all brush type crap I am soooooooooo sore. I will love it once I get into some shape but till then it will be a lot of Ibprofen, hot baths and walking funny:) I am just so glad to be out doing something and making some money so we can start catching up on things and getting those that helped us paid back. That will make me feel soooooooooo much better. Also an awesome things is that I can ride the shuttle van to work everyday so I will only have to drive 2 miles to the park and ride so that will save a ton in diesel and wear and tear on the truck. It is so beautiful up there and the people are really nice so I think it is going to be a great season. Just got to make it through the first couple weeks:) Thank you everyone for the prayers that my body holds up those are still appreciated:) Well better go get in the hot bath and then get ready for bed!!!

I start the new job tomorrow:)

2011-04-18T17:06:00.003-06:00

Well tomorrow will be my first day at the new job. I am very excited and nervous at the same time. It will be so nice to be out of the house, making money and hopefully getting into better shape. I am praying and would really appreciate prayers that my body will hold up to this. I know it is going to be hard for a while as I am soooooooooooo out of shape and I can deal with that I just don't want my body to pitch a big fit and land me in the hospital so we will see:) I just am excited to be out and about again. It will run now thru probably end of October so I can do it for 6 months:) We are going to be getting our insurance next month which is also very exciting. I have been doing a lot research and one of the first things I am going to address is the possibility of celiac disease. I have done a lot of research and it does coincide with auto immune problems like hashimotos disease. It also would explain why in 3 years I have not been able to get my thyroid levels to bounce if it is inhibiting proper absorption of my medication. So we will see. I was told not to try a gluten free diet to wait and do the testing or they may not get accurate test results. I would hate that to be the problem but really all I want is answers so I can start making my life better and not suffer all the time. I will post tomorrow on my first day at the new job:)

And the blows just keep coming!!

2011-04-15T12:39:00.004-06:00

So I got some horrible news this am. My grandma, the woman that prity much raised me and came to my rescue whenever I needed it was diagnosed with breast cancer:( I am beyond sad and worried. They did catch it early thank gosh, so she will have surgery to remove it and then check the lymph nodes, radiation and then hopefully it will be gone. I know i am lucky to be 31 and still have my grandma in my life. I don't know what i would do without her. To be honest if it weren't for her and GOD I wouldn't be here today or be the person I am. She helped me through a very tough life and kept me from a lot more harm that could have come to me. That woman is amazing at how she looks at life with all the hurt her kids and grand kids have put her through. I know this will sound like a little kid but I will stomp my feet and say I am not ready to give up my grandma yet!!!! So please pray all will go well. Then another blow just a few minutes ago. One of my cousins also was diagnosed with breast cancer, hers more advanced so lots of prayers are going out all around. Really wanting to be back in Oregon and close to my friends and family:( So please again prayers are appreciated. Thank you everyone for your love and support.

In God's Time...Great reminder in hard times

2011-04-15T08:38:00.007-06:00

(sorry you will probably have to go down to the music and press stop to hear video)

So it hasn't been easy lately, well last couple years really, it seems like we can't catch a break and keep getting farther behind. We try to concentrate on the good and be grateful for what we have but a lot of it could be snatched away in a second. It is so hard worrying constantly if we are going to make rent, be able to get food, and worrying about paying back those we need to and we can't even think of paying off debt yet. So to say the least the panic attacks have increased and the depression is in full swing. But we both just keep praying and putting our trust in GOD. This song came on the radio and it really made me think, the perfect song at the perfect time. I know things could be worse and there are people who do have it worse. I am trying to have a good attitude and I have never been one to be so down or have no hope but last year or so has been really hard, it has just been one thing after another. We think we are going to get going the right direction and then another thing happens. So we will just keep praying and trusting it is all in GOD's Time!!!!

I got the job!!!!!!!!!!!!:)

2011-04-08T15:33:00.003-06:00

I am sooooooooooo excited I just got the call and I got the job at carbondale parks department. I will be one of 3 on the mow crew:) I am soooooooooooo very excited!!! I can't wait to get out of this house and feel good about something. I think it will also help with my weight endeavor. All day of running a weed eater should be a good workout. I am sure the first few weeks will be torture but I am excited about that:) I can't wait to just be outside and being active. I think it will make a big difference for me and help out finances for sure!!! It is only a seasonal job so that will work out good also to be able to go back home in the late fall or winter to visit. And by then we should hopefully have some bills under control and it won't be mandatory for me to work. Thank y'all for all the prayers, I am very grateful!!!!

Need suggestions for weight loss!!

2011-04-07T15:00:00.005-06:00

Ok so I GOT TO GET THIS WEIGHT OFF!!!! I think a lot of my depression is coming from hating what I see in the mirror. I don't like being so over weight and out of shape. I have always been a goer and a doer and this is really limiting me. My body hates me and attacks me on a regular basis but I can't stand the way I look anymore and I don't feel healthy. I will admit that I am terrible at sticking with it. When I have someone else to do it with or if I am paying to use a gym I am able to push my way through and get results but I don' t have either option right now. I know everyone says put on your big girl panties and just do it! If it were that easy I would have already done it and not have this self hate going on. I admit I am weak. I just want to find something that works and I enjoy and do it. I would love to join our little gym down the road, but right now a big gym membership is probably not a way to help get us out of debt. So I am looking for suggestions. It will have to be stuff I can prity much do here at home and I don't have any equipment. I do have a Jillian Michael's 30 day shred so I will throw that in some. I was wanting some Pilate's and yoga maybe to mix in for strength, any recommendations? I just really want to get this weight off, I want to go into summer excited to wear shorts and tank tops:) So if anyone has any suggestions on things that have worked for them, I would REALLY REALLY appreciate it:) I wish I was rich enough to be sent off to fat camp:) I know it would change my life:) Well I will have to build a fat camp of my own I guess:)

Thanks for all the birthday wishes!!

2011-04-07T09:47:00.003-06:00

I just realized I had meant to send a thank you out to everyone that commented to say happy birthday and I didn't:( BAD BLOGGER!! I just want to thank y'all, that was very sweet and made me feel loved. It wasn't all to exciting, but we did go out to dinner thanks to my grandparents sending me a birthday dinner check:) SO Sweet:) It was nice to eat a great meal in a neat little restaurant in the town next door. Now I hope my birthday wish comes true of a rockin year and things looking up this year:) Thanks again, and love y'all:)

Great weekend!!

2011-04-05T08:14:00.004-06:00

So our weekend is actually Sunday and Monday around here. At least for now:) Sunday was great, we got to head over to Rifle and hang out with brown eyed cowgirl-"the bad Indian":)(I am sorry you had to be there but every time Eric thinks of her saying this he cracks up all over again:)) The weather was crazy to say the least!!! Extremely windy for a while with heavy snow and even threw in some thunder and lightening. Well you ad to many bodies and horses thrown into to small of an area because of bad weather and it is bound to be interesting. I even got to ride spooks around for a little while right after we got there to warm him up with moon. He is such a great horse, I just love him:) But it was awesome to get to spend time with BECG and to see her run. I wish my video hadn't come out so dark but here it is anyways. I have a feeling it is going to be a good season for them:) It really made me miss being a part of something though. I loved barrel racing but honestly I think it made me miss showing more. I still hope someday I can get back into showing:) I miss it sooooo very much:)

Then the rest of Sunday we had to go meet Eric's new part time employers. I know as if he doesn't work enough already but any money at this point is needed. SO he will just be doing some odd jobs for a lady that lives prity close. Her son that is here for spring break REALLY wanted Eric to try and fix his little Suzuki 50 four wheeler, so Eric brought it home and he did get it running;) Two overgrow adults riding it equalled lots of laughter and fun:)

Yesterday Eric had to work over there again so it was just a day of cleaning for me. Just a nice weekend to get out and enjoy some fun and laughter, I REALLY NEEDED IT:)

Just WAY TO FUNNY:) My husband bites it!!:)

2011-04-03T19:21:00.003-06:00

My husband had to repair this little four wheeler for a boy that was REALLY wanting it fixed, but of course he had to test it out first. And how did I know he would crash it some how:) oh and I had to try it out to of course:) No crashes for me!!!

Lovin it when the sun comes out:)

2011-04-01T09:33:00.001-06:00

and yes he has whip cream on his lips:)

31st Birthday on the 31st!

2011-03-31T07:54:00.003-06:00

Yep I am 31 today. I guess now I am officially in my 30's:) I am not a person that worries to terribly about age, I think we all do some but it isn't a huge deal to me. I think every age has its advantages and you are as old as you feel and act:) OK maybe your body doesn't agree with your mind:) I just hope this next year is a great one, one full of hope and adventure. I just want us to finally get on our feet and at least get our debt manageable and paying on it. That is my birthday wish:) I just want to be free of so much worry and stress. That would be the best birthday present ever!!! I had someone else I know do this on their bday and I thought it was fun. Just some fun questions. 1. Have you ever had a surprise party? Sadly no:( 2. What is the best gift you have ever gotten? This is tough because I love gifts even in the smallest of forms. The littlest things mean the world to me. I probably would have to say my montana silversmith statue from my handsome:) 3. What is the worst gift you have ever gotten? HMMMMMM.... honestly I can't think of anything. 4. What would be your dream gift? for sure a vacation. I love to travel so a weekend get a way, or if money no object somewhat a cruise or something. Just a chance to get away. 5. Which birthday has been your favorite?(So far) Probably my 8th bday my parents had a party for me and my dad since his bday is only few days after mine and we had a huge bonfire by our pond and we all roasted hot dogs and such and fished, it was just a great day of our whole family having a great time. 6. Which birthday was your least favorite? My 18th. No one remembered. It was two days later that most people remembered if at all. I was so excited and thought I would have a great party and all and nothing. 7. What is your favorite kind of cake? Black forest cake without the raspberry filling. 8. What is your favorite birthday dinner? Oh that is a tough choice. But I really love a big steak dinner so probably Texas roadhouse or olive garden:) 9. From 1-10 how important are birthdays to you? 8 I think it is a very important day. It is the day you were put on this earth and I think it allows others to show how important you are to them on a day that is just yours:) Unless you share your bday with someone:) 10. Describe a very cool way to celebrate a birthday?(ideas for others:)

Interview yesterday

2011-03-30T08:59:00.006-06:00

So I had my interview with carbondale parks and rec yesterday, it went really well. He will call probably end of next week or beginning of next. I hate to wait but they don't need anyone for a couple weeks since it is still crazy weather lately:) I really hope I get it as it pays well, and it would get me out doing some physical labor, which Gosh knows I need that!!!!! We are just hoping my body responds well to it:) It has no choice really we need the money and I need the exercise. So hopefully I get it. Eric is stressing out trying to figure out how we can afford to fix the car and such, I personally don't think it is worth fixing and so we also keep an eye out for a cheap beater car that will get us from point A to B. The transmission is bad and everyone wants $1200-$2000 to fix it and these transmissions come to find out are notorious for going bad so no thanks don't think that would be a good investment. Probably have to drive Eric to work first and share the car for a month or so. But poor Eric, he would have to be to work at 5:30 and he usually doesn't start till 7. Guess he will have to take up reading or something:) So please if you have a minute pray we can workout our transportation stuff well. Thanks we would really appreciate it. I just really want to get this job to pay off some big things that are due right now and totally stressing me out. This would help to get things manageable. We are also hoping that Eric's hours will start picking up so we can get all those wonderful people that have helped us paid back and get the pressing bills that are due now and WON'T wait paid. Just can't wait to hear. I have also been looking other places but this one pays way better so we will see.

Too Cute Tueday:)

2011-03-29T09:36:00.001-06:00

Well atleast I think he is:)

I know its late...But my heart is broken!!!!

2011-03-24T23:25:00.003-06:00

It is late but I can't sleep. My best friend called me just a little while ago and I knew something was wrong when it was this late. She couldn't even get the words out and I knew what was wrong. The little baby inside of her is gone not to enter this world. She couldn't hardly say anything she was crying so hard. It broke my heart!!! I can only imagine a little the hurt she is going through. It has devastated her. I know lots of woman go through miscarriages but it doesn't change the fact that those woman lost a baby no matter how far along it was. It was a baby and they will morn the loss of that child forever. They will always wonder what it would have been or who they would have become. My heart is soooooo broken for her. She is my best friend in the whole world, I can't describe our friendship as any better than we are soul mates for sure. We have a connection that is so beyond just a great friendship. We always know something is up before the other even picks up the phone. I just hurt so bad now not being able to be there for her. I just want to be there to help her through or just be there. I hate being so far. She has been there for me through so much and when she needs me most I can't be there:( I can't describe the pain that causes me:(
I am hoping and praying the LORD will comfort her and help her to work through this. I pray he will help me, how selfish I know but I just feel like I am failing her as a friend. I hate not being able to go to her when she needs me or any of my friends and family for that matter. This isn't the first time. I just pray the LORD will work this all out for his good and be with Candi through this soooooooooooo very rough time!!! Thank you all for listening to me babble. I appreciate all the thoughts and prayers!!!

To have a baby or not to have a baby???

2011-03-23T18:39:00.004-06:00

I have written about this before but it is coming up a lot lately with lots of friends and relatives pregnant and having babies and I got a call Sunday that my best friend is pregnant again:) I am SOOOOOOOOOO excited for her and I get to be there again when the baby is born. I loved getting to see her first little girl enter this world. I wish we lived closer so I could be there more. I miss that little girl and I miss my best friend like crazy!!! So this again brought up my baby questions.
I wouldn't worry so I guess, but it is not like I am getting any younger:) I know people have babies older but it is nice to be younger and have some energy when they are teenagers:) I go back and forth with it. I know that Eric wants kids terribly but he never pushes it on me and never pressures me. I just worry about being able to take care of them, provide things they need and some of the things they want:), I worry I will regret it, I worry what this world will even have to offer them the way things are going. I guess another big reason is that we are so secluded from all our friends and family. I don't want my kids to grow up alone. I want to be responsible and be financially stable and all that, but realistically that will NOT be any time in the near future. I wish it was but it isn't. Then everyone always says if you wait till you can afford them you will never have them. That is true I guess.
I just really don't know what to do and I feel a lot of pressure lately to make a decision. I am definitely excited to get the insurance in a few months and get some stuff figured out with my health and then talk with the doctor about even the possibilities. I guess the biggest thing is I am a BIG FAT CHICKEN!!!!!

Its all about pringle last few days!

2011-03-21T14:29:00.003-06:00

Well he seems OK still, this am he was acting a little funny, but seems just fine now. I am not sure if he just got a tummy ache and is getting over it or what. Sometimes you may never know. I have continued the pro biotics and will probably start a daily supplement with pro bios in it just for good measure. Just hope we are REALLY over the hump and heading on the uphill. I am exhausted and stressed to the max. I love my horses more than most probably should. I find myself soooooo torn and sad:( I just really want to be able to take proper care of them. Don't get me wrong they are fed well and such but these emergencies we can't afford. I just feel like I am letting them down by not being able to get them to the vet if need be. I HATE TO SAY THIS AND I CRY AS I SAY IT but I have been going back and forth with finding them new homes.............................:( :( :( :(
I don't want to give them up that is for sure but it isn't fair that they should suffer if we can't "afford it" and by we can't afford it I don't mean we just won't, I would go without food and such to take care of them but the fact is we just don't have the money. I was so beyond stressed that Eric had to leave work and hour and a half early because we needed the overtime to make rent. I know you shouldn't have them if you can't afford them, but we are in a lot different circumstances now than before. Life throws some curve balls. I just love them so much and really who wants a broke down old mare. Pringle needs work and he could be someone a good horse, Eric wants to ride him so bad but doesn't have the time and we can't afford for him to get hurt training him if it should happen. I am just so torn and sad right now. I remember the feeling when I gave shar up the first time when I was so sick from my cancer and the thyroid. I wasn't even buying my meds so we could help her more and so we found her a home but everyday for the next year and a half I missed her like crazy and cried A LOT!!! I know I am a huge baby anymore. Just want to make sure we do what is best for them and not be selfish, but also don't want to be hasty and make bad decisions. For now I am loving them like crazy and doing the best we can:)
So THANK YOU EVERYONE FOR PRAYERS AND SUPPORT MEANS MORE THAN YOU WILL EVER KNOW!!! They say we are in for a storm so please pray it isn't to bad, I think Pringle could use good weather:)

Pringle Update

2011-03-20T10:18:00.002-06:00

Well Pringle does seem better this am. I am sooooooooooo glad, but I will not be fooled that we are out of the woods yet. We will be keeping a close eye on him for a while. We got up about once and hour last night to check on him and to our happiness not once was he laying down or acting up so that is a good thing. So thank you for the prayers and please keep them coming. This will definitely make us have to get our emergency kit together. We were just to spoiled on the ranches as we always had everything on hand and didn't have to worry about having our own, we know now that isn't the case. So we are going to have to get a kit together and that will help in the future.

Colicky as I write

2011-03-19T12:31:00.003-06:00

So pringle is acting very uncomfortable this morning. He is doing the pawing, the belly kicking, the side biteing the lay down and want to roll. I have been walking him once and hour for at least 20 min and gave him some pro bios. I am hoping and praying that he will come out of this. I called a vet to come out the only one in the area, the other is out of town and the others closed since of course it is Saturday. They were going to charge a $175 emergency fee, and then a farm call that could be as high and then for whatever they do while they were here. She wanted to prepare me that it could be $500. Of course the tears welled up and I thanked her for her time and now am praying and walking hoping he gets better. I am typing and going to the window to check every couple minutes so sorry if it doesn't make sense:) SO please if y'all could send prayers pringles way, we would really, really appreciate it:)

A St. Patty's Day snow storm!!!!

2011-03-18T09:00:00.004-06:00

So our forecast said that there was a chance of snow with less than an inch possible. BOY WERE THEY DEAD WRONG!!!!! It snowed most of the day but didn't stick really because ground was so warm and then around 4:30 huge snowflakes and temperatures dropped and it started piling up like crazy and we ended up with over a foot, if all of it had stuck it would have been A LOT more. Crazy how nice the weather has been and BAM have some winter again:) It is beautiful though. But lots of accidents on I-70. Our power went out about 8:30 last night and didn't come back on till about 4am this morning. We saw they glow from the transformer blowing and with all the trees bending and breaking I am sure the power company was BUSY!!!

The horses when it started really picking up yesterday evening!

Pringle eating his dinner and trying to keep his bum to the wind:)

tree in front of our house yesterday evening............

tree now! A lot of it laying on the ground!

Babies eatin their breakfast this am.

Lots of branches down around our place now. This is blocking my way into their pasture at least they weren't to huge!

Happy St. Patty's Day and two weeks to 31!!

2011-03-17T08:44:00.006-06:00

Hope everyone has a very fun and happy St. Patrick's Day!!!!

So it is two weeks till I turn 31! Now I will officially be "in my 30's". It don't bother me to be in my 30's. It is funny how much it bothers Eric though:) I just think every year and decade of your life presents different adventures:) I am hoping this year will be a great year! The first half has been trying but we are praying things will look up and get better;)!!

We have no plans for my day, but whatever they will become will be fine with me:) Eric always says shoot I forgot it is coming up so fast:) He is just busy trying to work as much as they will let him and get things settled around here on the things that I can't do right now. Yes I am still in a lot of pain and still trying to get to feeling better. Can't wait for that insurance to kick in!!!

Flip flops and muffin tops!!!!

2011-03-14T08:17:00.003-06:00

If this doesn't help motivate me to loose weight!! I have just never understood the whole you get bigger so buy smaller clothes. It makes you look even bigger!!! But this was a creative way to point it out. Just funny on a Monday morning!!!

Pictures of the new place!!

2011-03-11T15:57:00.002-07:00

Well here is some pictures of the new place that I have been promising. I finally got to walmart to get our pictures on disk so that I could erase the ones I had on our cameras disk. Can't wait to have a computer where we can burn our own pictures but that is a whole other post of its own on how my computer sounds like it is going to implode!! Someday:) I wish my camera took better pictures cause these don't do justice on how prity the landscape around us is.

The front yard and house!! It is an older 1978 mobile home but with all the updates and painting they did inside I wouldn't have known it was that old. It is a 3 bdrm 2 bath. The lady before us had 5 draft horses and let them loose in front yard so it is prity messed up.
our view from the front door.

My camera doesn't take very good pictures, it is really pretty.

Our front yard and some of the view

The backyard looking over into the horse pasture. Yes it is a little bit of a hill down there so now you can see why I spent so much of my time on my rear end when it was muddy and icy!! Good exercise though.

Duke enjoying backyard that needs quite a bit of work but they love it and it is fenced in so that is great. It overlooks the other half of horse pasture and the mountains in the back.

The bluffs in the distance are sooooooo pretty. Wish I could get better pictures.

More of our view from the back porch

Pringle and you can see the river barely in the back part there. gotta get their big pasture all fenced now that the ground isn't to frozen.

My baby girl waiting for more food:) She looks soooooooooooo good since changing her feed. I am soooooo happy. She isn't bones anymore!!

Praying for safety!!!

2011-03-11T08:53:00.002-07:00

I am praying for all those in japan and also for relatives of mine on the oregon coast as the tsunami heads for there. I have an uncle visiting the coast, I have a nephew that lives on the coast and we have quite a few beach houses in the family and friends. So I am praying it will not be a bad tsunami. It is just crazy how many natural disasters are happening lately!!! May the LORD be with everyone through this time.

28 Hours of Hope!!!

2011-03-10T09:08:00.006-07:00

28 Hours of Hope

http://k99.com/give-to-the-28-hours-of-hope/

Below is a post from a blogger friend(GUNDIVA) and I wanted to share it and ask for y'all help. I to have been in abusive situations and no one said anything. Friends and family said it wasn't their buisness or didn't want to get involved. I hate to say this but if you know it is going on IT IS YOUR BUISNESS and you could save someones life by saying something. I didn't give much but if everyone gave a little, guess what that would equal a lot!! I know this may not be your city or even your state but it will help someone that needs help. WE CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE EVEN IF JUST A LITTLE!!! Click the above link if you want to donate. Thanks:)

(gundiva post)
In the three years or so since I've been blogging, I've seen bloggers who have never met face-to-face pull together to help little girls with cancer, mommies with cancer, people just having a rough time who need a shoulder to cry on and have seen the bloggers stand together, strong, through good times and bad.

I've been lucky enough to participate in the blogging community and have been blessed enough to help some of our fellow bloggers.

This time, I'm asking for help. Not for me, but for abused children in Larimer County. I was lucky enough growing up that my mom got us out of a potentially abusive environment. She took the beatings for us until she said, "enough!" and got out. She had a very wise counselor at the time who told her that she was going to get out of the marriage no matter what - she either gathered her courage and left, or she'd get out of it in a pine box. There were no options. He also explained that wife beaters don't stop with the wives - they move on to the pets and the children and when he killed her, who was going to protect the kids?

People knew about the beatings Mom was recieving, but what is there to do? Our close neighborhood friends knew, but, you know, what happens behind closed doors, how is it their business?

We kids knew. Hell, Dad would line us up on the couch in birth order and command us not to move when the beatings commenced. We knew, but we didn't say anything. It was our own dirty secret. If we told, we'd be the ones getting the beating. Selfish, I know, but we were kids. Dad was a big, strong firefighter. What chance did we have against him?

Silence was our enemy.

We didn't tell.

The neighbors didn't tell.

The teachers didn't tell.

Silence.

Thank God for Mom's counselor. I don't know if she told or if he figured it out. He was a smart man. Smart enough that he knew the patterns of abusers. When Dad started in on Junior, the youngest of the four of us, Mom realized her counselor was right and got out.

There are a lot of kids nationwide, not just in Larimer County, whose parents aren't as strong as Mom is. There are a lot of kids for whom Silence is their enemy.

They don't tell.

Their neighbors don't tell.

Their teachers don't tell.

Silence...

...it's killing our kids.

The Good Morning Guys at K99 sponsor the 28 Hours of Hope every year in an attempt to break the silence and raise money to help abused children in Larimer County. They will stay on the air for 28 consecutive hours, taking calls and pledges from the community and Country Music celebrities. They went on the air at 5:00 am this morning and will continue to be on the air until 9:00 am on March 11th. Jeez, and I complain about working fifteen hours straight - these guys will be working non-stop for twenty-eight hours for a cause they believe in.

RockCrawlinChef and I will be making a donation and I'd like to ask each of my followers to make one, too. It doesn't have to be a lot. Even $1.00 on your credit or debit card will help. The change in your car's ashtray or change jar will help. To donate, click here or on the picture in the sidebar, that will take you directly to the donation page. You can make a donation on-line, over the phone, or via mail.

If you can't afford to donate, then do something about the Silence. If you suspect a child is being abused or neglected, tell someone. Break the cycle of Silence. All it takes is a phone call to break the cycle - either to the police department or social services.

And, please, please feel free to steal this post for your own blogs or link to it. The more exposure we can get, the more we can help the children and break the Silence.

Just a hello and I am still alive:)

2011-03-08T08:02:00.002-07:00

I know I have been prity quite the past week, but I have still been really struggling with not feeling so well and my hands and fingers hurting. So I have been cutting back on the typing. Not a lot of excitement either. We did drive down about a 1/2 mile to the neat little parking area by the river and took all the dogs for a walk. Yes three dogs and two people very entertaining:) but only because the pup is still learning. When we were trucking few years back I could walk all 4 of our dogs on leashes by myself at the truck stops and such and never worry about my security:) I do miss the traveling. I think the dogs do some also, they sure loved going places. But the walk by the river was nice and of course bear had to take a swim. BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!! Is all I could think! Even little Duke tried it but when it got above his knees he got scared and got the heck out of the river:) I so need to get my pictures of my disks so I can get pictures for y'all of the new place. I need to get a new computer eventually so I can burn my own pictures and not have to go to walmart and pay ridiculous amounts. Its on my someday list:) Hope everyone has a great week!

SOOOOOOOOO MUCH Pain

2011-03-03T08:33:00.002-07:00

This post won't be long as even typing brings tears to my eyes. My body has been wreaking havoc with me lately and has really been getting worse. The past two days all of my joints hurts soooooooooooo bad, even my fingers feel like I sprained every single one of them. I have had this happen on and off but not usually all of my joints at once and not for this long. Oh my gosh I wish it would stop!!!! I can't wait till our insurance kicks in and I just pray it won't have pre-existings. I am thinking of starting a gluten free diet. I have read a few things on that being a trigger for hypothyroid people. I know this will be expensive and hard to do but if it makes me better I will try it!! I am going to read up on it and see what I can do.